This is what I'm talking about! Love love love love love them! Please listen to this, this is what parenting and loving each other is all about!
May 17, 2010
Facing your fears
Dearest Clarity,
My biggest fear in the last year, was the possibility of one day having to face my daughters father. Well it finally happened. It was so intense, and I was so nervous about how it would go. I couldn't help but think, it was gonna be as horrible as it was the last time I saw him, but it wasn't. I'm glad it finally happened because the anxiety of not knowing, was horrible. Not knowing if we would ever see him again or if he would ever come around to see our child again. I feel proud of myself for being strong enough to face him, and stand up for what I believe is best for our daughter. If he wants to be in her life again, he is gonna have to prove it. He has to gain her and my trust back, by showing us he can be reliable. Call when you say your gonna call and show up when you say your gonna show up. When I spoke to my daughter about her dad contacting me, she was not happy. She told me that she isn't ready to see him yet, and I told her that that's ok. When I asked her how it made her feel, she said sad, angry and scared. I was so proud of her for standing up for herself. I know she will come around eventually and want to see him, but until then I told her I am here for her no matter what, and it's up to her when she is ready to see him again. It's so important when kids go through intense things like this, that you communicate about there feelings and let them know that they are safe and have your support.
No matter what happens, I've learnt that putting the work into becoming the strongest person and family you can be, is the most important thing in the world. Yes, I want my daughter to have a relationship with her dad, but if he screws it up and doesn't follow through, we will be ok. We will be ok because we are mother and daughter, best friends, partners in crime and most importantly each others biggest supporters.
My biggest fear in the last year, was the possibility of one day having to face my daughters father. Well it finally happened. It was so intense, and I was so nervous about how it would go. I couldn't help but think, it was gonna be as horrible as it was the last time I saw him, but it wasn't. I'm glad it finally happened because the anxiety of not knowing, was horrible. Not knowing if we would ever see him again or if he would ever come around to see our child again. I feel proud of myself for being strong enough to face him, and stand up for what I believe is best for our daughter. If he wants to be in her life again, he is gonna have to prove it. He has to gain her and my trust back, by showing us he can be reliable. Call when you say your gonna call and show up when you say your gonna show up. When I spoke to my daughter about her dad contacting me, she was not happy. She told me that she isn't ready to see him yet, and I told her that that's ok. When I asked her how it made her feel, she said sad, angry and scared. I was so proud of her for standing up for herself. I know she will come around eventually and want to see him, but until then I told her I am here for her no matter what, and it's up to her when she is ready to see him again. It's so important when kids go through intense things like this, that you communicate about there feelings and let them know that they are safe and have your support.
No matter what happens, I've learnt that putting the work into becoming the strongest person and family you can be, is the most important thing in the world. Yes, I want my daughter to have a relationship with her dad, but if he screws it up and doesn't follow through, we will be ok. We will be ok because we are mother and daughter, best friends, partners in crime and most importantly each others biggest supporters.
May 14, 2010
Sade - Babyfather
Love this song, love this video, love Sade! If you don't have her new album Soldier of Love, you should get it.
Enjoy!
May 13, 2010
Jenna Andrews- Tumblin Down
Check out my friend Jenna Andrew's new single Tumblin Down! She is an amazingly talented artist, I love her and I know you will to!
Enjoy!
May 10, 2010
Proud to be a soccer mom!
Dearest Clarity,
So today was my daughter's second soccer game. It's sooooooo much fun! I'm so proud of her for getting out there and trying it out. I thought it would be a struggle just to get her to wear her team shirt, but she is doing great. Yes, she all of a sudden busts into dance on the field, or starts picking the grass, but she is so proud of herself after she gets off the field. Especially if she kicks the ball, even if it's in the wrong direction. I wanted to write about this because I was reminded that we should always give our kids a chance. Even though you might think they won't enjoy something or they won't be interested in something, you just never know. It's so important to expose them to different things because I think they will surprise themselves as well. You just won't know until you try. So proud to be a soccer mom!
May 9, 2010
I can't Breathe!!!!!!!
Dearest Clarity,
I wanna apologize for not writing in so long. These last few weeks have been soooooooo crazy for me. It was my birthday, my daughter's birthday and then Mother's Day of course. During this time my daughter's father also contacted me for the first time in about a year. It's shaken up my world. I feel scared, confused, sad, angry and the anxiety is so intense. What do I do? How do I trust he won't go again, why now? The questions, thoughts and feelings go on and on. I wanna believe that somehow things will be ok. He is back and will be a great father to my daughter, but after all our history and heartache and let downs, how can I believe anything but destruction. I literally feel like I can't breathe! I know what I need to do, what I need to say and how this needs to be done, but the second I think about confronting him or just talking to him, I just wanna die. I can't help but have all those old feelings of fear and anxiety come back. I guess all I can do is stand up for what I believe in, and just trust that whats meant to be will be. I wanna believe in him, I really do. I just pray for my daughter's sake, that this works out and doesn't cause her anymore pain.
I wanna apologize for not writing in so long. These last few weeks have been soooooooo crazy for me. It was my birthday, my daughter's birthday and then Mother's Day of course. During this time my daughter's father also contacted me for the first time in about a year. It's shaken up my world. I feel scared, confused, sad, angry and the anxiety is so intense. What do I do? How do I trust he won't go again, why now? The questions, thoughts and feelings go on and on. I wanna believe that somehow things will be ok. He is back and will be a great father to my daughter, but after all our history and heartache and let downs, how can I believe anything but destruction. I literally feel like I can't breathe! I know what I need to do, what I need to say and how this needs to be done, but the second I think about confronting him or just talking to him, I just wanna die. I can't help but have all those old feelings of fear and anxiety come back. I guess all I can do is stand up for what I believe in, and just trust that whats meant to be will be. I wanna believe in him, I really do. I just pray for my daughter's sake, that this works out and doesn't cause her anymore pain.
Happy Mothers Day!
I wanna wish all the amazing hard working mother's out there a HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!!!
I hope you all had a great day! xoxoxo
I hope you all had a great day! xoxoxo
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)